Wednesday, 2 December 2015

Meal Prep + Weekly Workouts + and Being Vulnerable

I opted to share some of my thoughts after a tough weekend and the shift in my focus on Monday, instead of my usual Meal Prep + Workouts. So today we are playing a bit of catch up.

The month of November was a busy one for me training-wise. Which is not uncommon for me when I am struggling. I often train (*and train hard*) to fill a void and to channel my nervous energy. This month was no exception. I felt like my body let me down (*again...*) so I needed to know that it was strong and capable. My type-A tendencies were in over-drive and training is something I can control when I feel a little lost.

This month included...
  • Cycling - 9 hrs
  • Running - 59 km
  • Weights - 2 hrs
  • Yoga - 6 hrs
But you can only hide your true feelings away for so long. So despite trying my best to push away my grief and sadness, and hide my feelings behind sweat, all the of the stress and fear I have been carrying around came tumbling out.

I cried on Saturday while shopping for Christmas presents. Because this year we were supposed to be shopping for one more.

I cried on Saturday because family is something I value and want more than anything. But I am scared that it won't happen for me.

I cried on Saturday because this is something I can't control. And surrendering that control leaves me feeling vulnerable and helpless.

All those tears and all that stress, made me realize that this time I need to do things differently.
This time I need to seek stillness, accept my sadness, and give my heart space to heal.

This week's workouts reflect these changes...
Monday - 90min Yoga
Tuesday - 60min Hot Yoga at Goodlife Fitness
Wednesday - 5km trail run with 2x hill scrambles
Thursday - 8km run
Friday - Rest
Saturday - Rest
Sunday - 40min Yoga + 10 min Meditation

I realize this is not the norm for me. So if you are hoping for running and racing motivation, that is not me right now. It has been a difficult transition for me as well. But I am seeking a gentler approach these days, because my goal is something different right now.

I am learning to open my heart, surrender my fears, and offer my hope to the universe.
It is scary. It is hard. But I think that might be why it is so necessary.

I have continued to focus on my nutrition and have been experimenting with more diverse gluten-free options. I have a better handle on finding gluten-free option when I am traveling for work, so that is helping to make life a little bit easier. I have noticed a big difference in my energy levels over the past month, and will likely be heading in for follow-up blood work in a couple of weeks to see how my thyroid levels have changed.

This week's dinners include...
Monday - Conte's Gluten-Free Perogies  and Salad (*definitely recommend these! I found them at Whole Foods and the are music to my Eastern European Heart*)
Tuesday - Freshii Buddha Satay on Quinoa with Chicken
Wednesday - Fresh on Bloor Moroccan Bean Stew, Gluten-Free Corn Bread and Hummus
Thursday - Sol Bean Burgers and Salad
Friday - Chicken Green Curry on Rice Noodles
Saturday - Madras Chicken
Sunday - Pork Tenderloin, 2 baby Sweet Potatoes, and Salad

I hope you are all having an amazing week!
Love Your Favourite Darwinian Fail,