Last week was a tough week for me, but necessary as part of my grieving process. In the past, I have been really good about meeting my grief head on. I have always been able to own it, to accept it, to feel it, and to move forward.
I didn't do that this time.
I tried to put it away. I didn't want to face it. I didn't want to talk about. I simply didn't want it to be part of the story. I was tired of being the tragic misfit who overcomes. I just wanted this joy. So I didn't want to face my grief and allow it become of my journey.
But it is.
And I have to feel it to let it go. Last week was part of that.
And I may have eaten some of my feelings along the way. I remained gluten-free. But I definitely had more than my fair share of gluten-free cookies. And I definitely had a burger (with veggies so I wasn't completely out of control) on Tuesday Night. This week's meals definitely reflect a stressful week.
But I spent the weekend with family, and felt myself relax (mostly, it is still a work in progress).
I hosted the family Friday Night for my Mother-In-Laws Birthday, something I actually really enjoy doing. I put on my apron, I baked, I used my fancy china, and everyone left full.
My husband and I ran together. We went to spinning on Sunday. We went hiking. We decompressed with Jessica Jones on Netflix. I even let myself have a glass of wine on Sunday without guilt.
So now I feel ready to start the week. And better able to greet life with my plan for "life without a plan". (*that Type-A stuff is deeply rooted, so this is as relaxed as I get. There is no timeline, but there is always a plan*)
This week's dinners included...
Monday - Gluten Free Veggie Pizza
Tuesday - Gluten-Free Beef Burger from The Works with Veggies
Wednesday - Baked White Fish with Salad and Rice
Thursday - Gluten-Free Pasta with Garbanzo Beans and Pesto
Friday - Chicken, Quinoa Salad, and Green Salad (with a slice of gluten-free Carrot Cake)
Saturday - Prime Rib and Salad
Sunday - Coq Au Vin
This week I opted to scale back from my endurance training. Admittedly I tend to gravitate towards distance, because I am not a speed demon, but I want to work on lowering my body's cortisol levels. So while I am still doing tough workouts, they are going to be shorter. My runs are now no longer than 45 min. And I opted out of the last 30 min of Sundays Spin class and relaxed with a series of Sun Salutations instead.
I have also decided to sign up for the Santa Shuffle. It is December 5th, and it feels like a good way to ring in my 31st Birthday. Jamie and I are going to run it together, and because I have been feeling strong on the run lately I am going to try for a PB. My speed demon husband is going to pace me, so fingers crossed.
This Week's Workouts...
Monday - 10km Run
Tuesday - Rest
Wednesday - 60min Spin
Thursday - 60min Hot Yoga
Friday - Rest
Saturday - 8km Tempo Run
Sunday - 60min Spin + 15min Sun Salutations
I hope you all have a great week.
Love Your Favourite Darwinian Fail,