This year has been a hard year. There is no other way to say it. Although a lot of what is happening will be happening to my body, this journey is all happening smack dab in the middle of our life. As relative newly weds we knew there would be struggles, that life would throw curves, and that there would be ups and downs. And I know we said "in sickness and in health", but this battle wasn't something either of us saw coming.
I talk a lot about how BRCA has affected me, my body, my life, my perspective, and my plans. But I know this process has hurt him just as much. It takes a strong man to be able to stand by and support someone you love so deeply, but never let them see the way you are hurting too. So that is how I know I married one of the strongest men going.
I will be the first person to admit that I have spent the majority of the last year generally being a hopeless mess. I have been far, very far, from my best and floundering just to stay a float. And for every brave moment you all see on this blog, you should know there have been at least 3 times as many tear-filled nights spent in his arms to get there. His love, his support, and his strength has been my saving grace this year. There is no way to express how truly grateful I am. And how lucky I feel to have a man like this in my life.
So this post is a promise to him. This post is a vow for better days ahead. I know this year has been hard and not exactly what we had planned - but we are almost there. And I am going to work really hard to come back to you healthy and happy. Happily Ever After is still a work in progress, but I promise we are going to get there. I promise.
I love you!
Happy Valentines Day!
Love your Favourite Darwinian Fail,